"After the Affair teaches partners how to heal themselves and grow from the shattering crisis of an infidelity. Drawing on thirty-five years as a clinical psychologist, Dr. Spring offers a series of original and proven strategies that address such questions as: Why did it happen?; Once love and trust are gone, can we ever get them back?; Can I--should I--recommit when I feel so ambivalent?; How do we become sexually intimate again?; Is forgiveness possible?; What constitutes an affair in cyberspace?"--P. [4] of cover

Stage one: Reacting to the affair: "Is what I'm feeling normal?". Hurt partner's response: buried in an avalanche of losses ; Unfaithful partner's response: lost in a labyrinth of choices -- Stage two: Reviewing your options: "Should I stay or leave?". Exploring your ideas about love ; Confronting your doubts and fears -- Stage three: Recovering from the affair: "How do we rebuild our life together?". Learning from the affair ; Restoring trust ; How to talk about what happened ; Sex again ; Learning to forgive ; Sex, secrets, and affairs in cyberspace: living with the "new" infidelity -- Epilogue: revealing the secret: truth and consequences